Parents usually donâ€™t intentionally commit mistakes while teaching their children, rather it is their over concern about the future of their little ones as they care so deep affectionately. When we become parents, most of our time is dedicated to our children. We canâ€™t see anything beyond them. They are our biggest concern in this world. We become possessive and obsessed with their activities, try to teach them in every way. Here teaching our children not only mean to say academic only, but every aspect of life which includes everything related to their daily life.
- Thought process
First of all we start discussing about the mistakes parents commit while teaching. Parents commit mistakes because their love for their children is beyond anything. Here we will talk about some, just to make all parents alert, so that they donâ€™t repeat it.
Five top mistakes by Parents
- Lowers in Confidence
Mistake occurs while teaching our kids in their studies. Itâ€™s a common parentâ€™s duty to take care of their kids. Like every one, I too take care of my child; prepare him/her for school, packing lunch box, and make him/her wear school dress, every possible way to get him/her ready. We are always in high peak regarding school performance of our children.
We want them to be successful, so they feel happy with their accomplishment. But if they fail to live up to our expectations, we start to nagging them for that, with very intentions we try to take it but end exactly with very wrong strategies.
This will not only hamper their studies, but lower their confidence level. It is our duty which makes them realize that, by trying in a different manner, children can achieve, which will make them happy. So by nagging nothing can be achieved.
- Nagging and expectations
While doing homework, usually children are in search of different excuses, so that homework can be avoided. But if parents keep on nagging. The situation will become worse. Kids will either be hyper or angry with you, or will start arguing. End of the day, homework will remain pending.
Itâ€™s suggested that parents should also take care of the expectations and they should jointly work out to complete the homework. If your child suggest some points, regarding homework, should be tried out one of their ideas. Itâ€™s just giving them a little bit special feelings.
- Children are shelled, lack of Independence
Sometime we donâ€™t trust our children that they can carry on their studies alone, we also keep on telling them, do it like this, how? When? Always covering them under shell, what they will do? When they will do and how they will do? All these can give a basic protection to the children, but it will make them very much dependent on their parents. They wonâ€™t be independent in any kind work.
They will always lack confidence which will become a big problem in their future prospects. We parents are affectionate about our children. But too much affection is spoiling their future, without being known to us. WE are not aware how much they are lacking in confidence.
- Interfering in their studies
We parents have a tendency to interfere into their studies. We always do ask them; hey you studied this or that. Children get confused. They fail to decide, whether they will go with the school or parents. When they are studying, we must not intervene; by cross checking whether he is studying or lying. We have to motivate them for self-study so that they grow a self interest in studies. Self-study is a must for the growth of education. It is we always criticize them, that they are not following the rules of study.
But they canâ€™t learn anything through spoon feeding. Itâ€™s my analysis about my children, when I leave them to study of their own, they may have taken up very small paragraph, but what they have studied of their own is the best part. As they have learned it. When I am forcing some academic work on him, though doing for his benefit, but it may harm his flawless study.
We should motivate them in manner, that if they will complete their homework, they will be allowed their favorite show or some indoor games. Always we canâ€™t force them to study. They also need recreation. These daysâ€™ outdoor games are very rare, due to advancement of technology. So they are mostly engrossed in indoor games. We always want them to study academic books. But they should be allowed read story books; rather we must encourage them for that. It will increase their reflex level and they will have more interest in study.
We should give them time to blossom. They are butterflies in larva. We should give them time to come out of their own shell, rather than force them to come out of larvae in a hurry, that is we should let them come out of it before the proper time.Â When butterfly automatically comes out of larva, it spreads its wing to fly. But some failed to do, same with children. They will crawl, if they come out before their proper time. Children are like butterflies. Let them fly high.
- Grades & Marks
Grades and Marks are not the prime factors of studies. But we parents loose our control, when we see Grades and marks are not up to the mark. Forgetting about the where they are up to, we start scolding them, and compare them with others. But they too have self-respect. They feel down and humiliated, feel hurt that they failed to score like others, and their parents are not happy.
Rather supporting them in that period, we treat them by scolding and expect them to be motivated. But outcome is different and they lose interest in studies. They will start hiding things from parents. So itâ€™s we, the parents should not pressurize them, which can have a dare consequences.
Parents should not be dictators or Doormats. They should be friendly with children. Donâ€™t always criticize them, love them the way, that you donâ€™t expect anything, and rather want them to do what they love to do, if not unethical. Give them space, which is needed in their age.
Parents should put their children above all selfish interest and wants and should try to make them more responsible. It is ultimately parents who are the role models of the children. Maintain a relation of respect and communication. Ultimately the universal truth is parents are the best teachers of the children.